Why does this blog exist?

I grew up in the Worldwide Church of God (WCG) from the time I was five. Over the years I spent attending WCG, first as a child, and later as a baptized member, I made many friends, traveled to many different places for the Feast of Tabernacles, tithed on my income, and in general did the things that WCG taught us to do.

When I became an atheist in 1995, I left WCG behind.

But I didn't leave my history behind: WCG, its people, government, culture, politics, scandals and changes made a lasting impression on my life. A number of my friends and family still attend WCG or its offshoots. And despite my current view of Christianity and religion in general as false, I feel I share a sense of kindred spirit with those who attended (or still attend) WCG, and especially those who grew up attending.

Much has been made in discussions on the Net and elsewhere about WCG's various splinter groups and where those who have left the WCG ranks worship these days. But until I started this blog (long before the term "blog" was invented) I saw practically no discussion about those who have not only left the parent church, but who have left religion entirely. As non-believers, they can draw upon the considerable resources of the Net to engage in discussion groups and consider the arguments of theology vs. atheism. However, as former WCG members they, like myself, had nowhere to turn for support and the knowledge that they are not alone; which is why I decided to create this blog.

Requirements for posters: I invite you to submit your own personal story for publication here, if you were once a member of the WCG, or grew up in the WCG but were never baptized, and you now consider yourself an atheist, agnostic, humanist, unbeliever, freethinker, or Bright (please click the links to make sure you understand these terms.) Simply e-mail me with any information you would like to see posted. (Please make sure the subject line of your message includes "WCG".) You can include your name, your general geographic region, some kind of contact information (full address, e-mail, URL), and whatever short biographical information you like. To be considered for publication, clearly state that you meet the above requirements and that you'd like to be listed. I will never post anything you send unless you explicitly request.

Requirements for commenters: Comments on this blog are moderated. I will remove any comments that I feel disturb the supportive atmosphere of this site. This especially includes preaching, quoting scripture, proseltyzing posters back to the faith, etc. Start your own blog if you want to do that, and welcome to the 21st century.

Christine

Posted May 10th, 2009 by Robert McNally
Categories: Q&A

Hello all;

I’d like to ask for a little advice. I was born and raised in the WCG. Inevitable result: I am completely unable to understand why anyone, ever, would choose to be part of any church.

This causes problems.

Baffled and mildly disgusted at any mention of faith, I “shut down” when the subject is even hinted at in passing, and lose some respect for the speaker. I just can’t get past my knee-jerk dismissal long enough to learn about their beliefs and accept them.

So now for the question: How can I learn to appreciate the value of other peoples’ religions? It upsets me that I can’t have a conversation with friends without sneering whenever they say “pray”.

Clearly plenty of people here have gone from loyalty to WCG, to disdain for all religion, to acceptance. Any hints and resources on how to fast-forward to acceptance?

Thanks for reading.

Christine.
Queensland, Australia.

Joseph

Posted May 2nd, 2009 by Robert McNally
Categories: Personal Story

Dear Robert McNally,

I was glad to find your web page. I ‘googled’ “ex Worldwide Church of God gay.” I am a 46 year old man living in Amarillo, Texas. I feel like there is so much I have to write, and please, I hope you bear with me.

I was once completely immersed in the Worldwide Church of God. I was lured by such terms as “God’s family” and “elect” and “chosen few”. I was led to believe that I was “called” to this one “true” church to the point that I was finally baptized at the Natchez, Mississippi, WCG in the ’80s. I was supposed to come out of “the world” and live a life that was pleasing to God—of course, as defined by the church.

I knew I was gay going into this church, but I was in the closet and so full of shame that I couldn’t find a way to measure it. I guess I thought I was going to be made a better person. I believed God was working through this church and would open my eyes to the “truth.”  This “true church” was going to make me “whole” and “unperverted” and “one of God’s people,” and wash the dirt of homosexuality out of me once I became a baptized member.

But then it was driven home that baptism wasn’t enough. God would “bless” me ONLY if I obeyed the doctrines in the strictest sense. That included not being gay. If I didn’t follow the “letter of the law”, then I’d be left to fend for myself during the coming tribulations, and the anti-christ, and the hell of famine and torture—name something horrible you can think of that can be used to terrify a congregation into staying put. (Crap like this can still keep me up at night sometimes.)

I sought direction and comfort from several ministers of the church whereby I asked some tough questions about sexuality, only to be told to “pray about it.” All the while, there would be sermons blatantly condemning people who were gay and who would have no place with “God’s people” or in “Christ’s kingdom.” I remember one sermon during a holy day where the minister actually called homosexuals “dog vomit.” I was terrified. Another minister, Mr. John Ogwynn of the Baton Rouge, Louisiana, church, personally counseled me. I thought he was a kind man. But years later he went on to write an utterly scathing and unsympathetic article for The Plain Truth magazine on homosexuality. He likened us to pedophiles and vehemently denounced gays as “abominations” of God. He basically said he was sickened by it and practically demanded that’s God’s true people have no tolerance whatsoever for gay people.

I took on that shame and wished I were dead. I could not change who I was and have not been transformed by God or nature or science into a straight man. It was clear that I was not going to reap the same “blessings” as the straight people of God who were apparently the “true” people of God. It became crystal clear that it was God’s HETERO law, God’s HETERO doctrines, God’s HETERO people—anything and everything the church used (still uses) to control God’s “chosen” people by sticking the name GOD in front of it with the unspoken knowledge it only applies to HETERO people. And this has nothing to do with anyone in the real world who is heterosexual, but it was clear that I would be disfellowshipped if I ever became a “practicing” gay man and that, as a gay man, I was beneath God’s heterosexual chosen people.   

There used to be days I struggled to function. I have sought professional therapy and have been doing so since 2003. I have left a church I was completely convinced was THE genuinely one true church in existence directly sanctioned by God himself, from his mouth to Herbert Armstrong’s ear.

I don’t know what I believe in terms of a religion or a church any more. Nothing makes much sense in terms of religion or dogma or doctrines of men. Yet, I still feel guilt for being gay and for leaving the Worldwide Church of God almost 15 years ago. I still hear the doctrines and sermons ringing in my head. It’s as if I can’t escape them. I feel angry, scared, confused, bitter, and alone in this.

Surely enlightenment and understanding are not exclusive to WCG members. It’s difficult for me to let this really sink in. I believe my search for understanding the complexities of life continues not because I was a member of this church, but rather because I seek with an openly wounded heart as someone who was willing to be as faithful a servant of humanity as he knows how to be. Science helps me more and more as I continue to look for direction and enlightenment. I am beginning to open my eyes to the fact that homosexuality is genetic or inborn and not a “lifestyle” I have chosen in direct violation of some spiritual law. (And even still, part of me fights the notion that I am a heretic as I write this. Such is the mind-controlling and manipulation the “church” has on me.)

(I found a site, www.exitsupportnetwork.com, which shed some light on the Worldwide Church of God—now Grace Communion International. It has offered some hope and refers to WCG and its branches as ‘cults’.)

There’s more to this, and of course, I feel like I could write forever, but I suspect your eyes are tired from reading all this crap I’ve written. I think I’ll end up repeating myself. It’s just that I feel pretty hurt. But if you have made it this far, then I sincerely thank you for your time and patience. I am writing this with the understanding that gay people may not really be welcome here. But regardless, at least you have heard my story. If I pass the test, then please feel free to post this on your blog if you like. You may edit this as well if you need to. I hope to hear from you, even if it’s a short note.

With warmest regards,
Joseph
Amarillo, Texas

Joseph,

Thank you very much for sharing your story. In the Reseda, California WCG congregation where I grew up, I knew a man named John Silvera. John was a great guy— outgoing, always serving, active in the singles club and Spokesman Club, sang in the choir. I was still a kid when he became ill. I recall my mom going to the hospital to visit him and taking me along. I remember how gaunt he looked, but how he still had a great attitude and was genuinely happy to see us. He died not too long after that. It was only much later I put together a number of clues and realized that he had been gay and in the closet, and had ultimately died of complications due to AIDS. I’m glad to have known John, and I hope he found what was looking for in the WCG, but it’s clear to me that in that environment, his true situation could never be openly understood, nor could he be accepted for who he was.

I know of another guy, a man I’ve never met but admire a great deal — an A.C. graduate by the name of DJ Grothe who eventually came out of the closet twice— both as gay and as a non-believer, who became a professional magician and skeptic, and who hosts the acclaimed weekly podcast Point of Inquiry.

I suppose my point in sharing these stories is to say that only you can write the end of your own story. And you will always be welcome in the community of freethinkers.

Best,

Robert

Jessica

Posted April 7th, 2009 by Robert McNally
Categories: Personal Story

I’m glad to have found your site.

I was in WCG from birth in 1977 to 1994 when I was “disfellowshiped”.  I didn’t realize at the time that it was the best thing that could have happened to me.

We started in the Church in Roanoke, VA.  My father would go sporadically but my mother, grandmother, grandfather, sister and I attended regularly.  I remember the things everyone else remembers - weekly Sabbath and Wednesday night Bible Study, and the activity books you would get when you were little (they taught the 10 commandments and you had to memorize stuff like the 12 Tribes of Israel).  Being very small and not having the critical thinking skills, I accepted the Church and those in it whole-heartedly.  I can even remember being very sick when I was little and my mother withholding medicine (she was a nurse by the way).  The Pastor anointed me with oil and after a while I got better.  I remember proclaiming, “Mama, God healed me!”

My parents divorced when I was 5 and my mother later remarried when I was 7. She was still attending church but her new husband did not.  She was suspended for 6 weeks since he was an outsider.  My mother remained loyal and although we barely had money for food or a functioning car she still gave all of her tithes.  We later moved to FL where I attended church at the Melbourne and Cape Coral/Ft. Myers locations.  I was involved in YOU youth group and SEP (summer educational program). Like many others on this page, my mother ruled with an iron fist and believed that any misstep on my part warranted physical enforcement (in our house the 6th Commandment of Honoring your Father and Mother was spouted between lashes).  I remember the things I went without - Christmas, birthdays, swine, makeup, Friday night football games and boys that were not affiliated with the church.  The irony of the latter is as I got older, the boys that attended WCG were actually worse!

When I was 17 I finally couldn’t take my mother’s physical and mental abuse. I moved out of her house and into my boyfriend’s parents house (I had my own room).  I remember her telling everyone that I ran away and was living in sin.  The Deacon and another member of the Church came to my new residence, wanting to know what had happened.  I went through the whole story and even showed them the room that was mine to assure them it was not as tawdry as they had been told.  It was obvious they had no interest in my side of the story and I was told that I was setting a bad example for the rest of the teens in the Church and couldn’t come back until I went back home.  I remember being devastated - I probably needed the guidance of the Church more at that time than ever.

My sadness eventually turned into anger.  Shortly after my departure, the Church had its schism and my mother stopped attending.  I went off to college realizing how much I had missed and trying to pack those lost years into 4 fairly self-destructive years of school.  Like others on this site, I have issues with being told what to do and find myself being very angry when I feel like I don’t have control of a situation.  No doubt a result of my WCG upbringing.  The irony of all of this is as my mother went through her second divorce she began to turn to a new mechanism to control her life - drugs.  Some might say its because she turned her back on God.  In my opinion, God turned his back on her.

I no longer find comfort in religion.  I spent too many years believing that mainstream Christianity was wrong and as I admitted above, I’m too stubborn (or feel like a fraud) to explore it now.  This is just one more thing the WCG took from me.

Jessica (Fainter)       

D. from Iowa

Posted January 3rd, 2009 by Robert McNally
Categories: Personal Story

I had a father in the WCG. He died when I was 14. I am thankful that his death stopped the teachings of the WCG in our home. I am an atheist because WCG showed how utterly unthinking humans can be. My children are being raised as free thinkers and we continue to expose them to all the wonders of life. It is hard for me to live in this area of non-thinkers. Could say so much more but everyone seems to have a grasp of the WCG and the impact it has. This blog site is wonderful. Thanks.

Andre

Posted November 2nd, 2008 by Robert McNally
Categories: Personal Story

I was a member of WCG— for too long— a huge chunk was taken out of my life.

A while back, I came across “The Painful Truth”, and after reading many of these articles, I realized I had made a deadly mistake— from age 13.

In this post I would like to make the following points:

1) WCG had the greatest impact in my life— its tentacles still pull at me.

2) Years after exiting, and much research, I found no answers— there are NO answers.

3) Some attempts were made by myself to inform others of my “new found” information; NO ONE responded; ironically I could not convert them; so much for “open minds.”

4) I had pointed out many horrors that former members had experienced, such as broken homes and
other issues— typical comments were that these tales were an exaggeration— so much for “True” Christian values; the DOCTRINES were all that mattered; never mind the misery of the members— I have been appalled by the CALLOUS nature of its members, and the blase response to suffering.

5) Many members who had exited, still had the SAME PROBLEMS than when they were in the WCG; e.g. self righteousness, talking down to people, thinking they have to correct other churches, starting tiny followings of about 5 or 6 people, and then castigating me for not joining their “fellowship”

I was a member in South Africa, and reside there at present.

Q&A: Raising Freethinking Kids

Posted October 27th, 2008 by Robert McNally
Categories: Q&A

Heather writes:

I grew up in the WWCG from 1976–1994. I am now 34 and I have children of my own. I “fell away” from the church at 19 and I find myself living in the “bible belt” of all places! My kids are 5 and 7 and they have started picking up things from their little friends like, “Did you know that God made us?” or even worse “Jesus loves us”. I am freaking out about it and I do not want to damage my children the way that I was. I just do not know how to explain to them that it is all just a messed up fairy tale. Both kids are being asked to go to church by their friends and I have actually had to explain to one of the more persistent parents the reason I do not believe as she does. She said she does not understand why that would affect my belief in God. Any advice? I have told my children that people go to church to learn how to be good people and that my husband I are good people already and we are teaching them the same. Does anyone else have near panic attacks at the mere thought of walking into a church?

I have two boys, 8 and 4, and my wife still attends WCG, and takes them along. Of course, WCG is not what it once was, but the kids (especially the older) are well aware of the issue of religion, and they ask questions. I think the first step is to realize that ultimately your children will be responsible for what they believe, and that the most important thing you can do is to let them know that you’ll love them no matter what they end up believing about God and religion.

The second step is to understand that right now is when you have the most influence over their mental development. By the time they are in their teens, peer groups become a much stronger influence than parents. But notice that I’m talking in terms of influence. Just as your kids will be responsible for what they believe, no-one— not you, not their peers, and not society— can dictate their beliefs to them, or “protect” them from ideas of which you do not approve.

So how can a freethinking parent best use their influence to raise freethinking children despite the conformist pressures all around them? Here are some ideas.

Educate yourself on critical thinking

The best way to teach your kids is to be an example to them. There are many great books and web sites on matters of interest to freethinkers, so become familiar with them and use them as ongoing resources for your own understanding.

Take your kids to museums and cultural experiences

I was shocked to learn that a friend of mine who grew up in the Bible Belt had never been to a science museum in her entire life. I think frequent trips to science museums should be part of every kid’s upbringing. But all sorts of other museums are good too: museums and galleries of art, natural history, culture, and children’s museums. When you go on family vacations, make a point of finding local museums to visit.

Read your kids challenging books

Ask your librarian to recommend books for your kids’ age-level that contain ideas that challenge artificial social “norms.” Even many of Dr. Seuss’ classics contain “subversive” ideas that help kids learn to understand different points of view and think for themselves.

Get books for kids that specifically teach critical thinking

I recommend Dan Barkers’ children’s books:

There is also a good children’s book on critical thinking about religion written in German, but the artwork thumbnails and English text are available online: “Which is the Way to God, Please,” Little Piglet Asked.

The Foundation for Critical Thinking also offers free downloads of their Miniature Guide to Critical Thinking for Children.

Build a library of DVDs on nature and science

There are many wonderful nature documentaries you can buy online or find in your library. Kids love these and watch them over and over again, and they’re a great way to learn about the diversity of nature as understood by science.

Point out the need for critical thought in every day life

Every time you shop, watch TV, or have family discussions there will be opportunities to dialog not only about what you and your kids think, but why you think it. For instance, on the rare occasions my kids get to watch television (usually in a motel room when we’re traveling) I will point out when commercials come on and ask them to figure out what they’re trying to sell— it’s not always obvious, but the kids enjoy the game of ferreting out the advertisers’ agenda.

Acknowledge the role the Bible and religion plays in our culture

Even if you don’t subscribe to particular theological interpretations of the Bible, it’s undeniable that it has played a huge role in shaping our Western language and culture. Furthermore, making any subject taboo only increases its mystique. So don’t shy away from opportunities for your kids to hear Bible stories or study the Bible as a document of historical, cultural, and literary significance. If you help them understand that the Bible is just one part of a rich human tradition of folk literature, then they’ll have a much better framework for understanding its true significance.

Point out that people have many differing beliefs

When growing up in an area where one sect of one religion dominates, it’s easy for kids to think that they need to do what “everyone” does. But it’s not too difficult to show them that everyone doesn’t think the same way about God and religion: there are many different kinds of Christian churches— who often don’t agree on critical issues; there are synagogues, mosques, and various sorts of temples in most cities, and there are also universities and science research facilities that often give tours. Show your kids that they don’t live in a monoculture of religion, but indeed, they live in a true “marketplace of ideas.”

Know what you believe and why, and be frank about your beliefs

My kids know I’m an atheist, and they also know their Mom believes in God. She and I explain our beliefs to our kids, and we don’t require them to choose between us. In fact, when my son starts talking about “being an atheist like Dad,” I tell him that he’s not old enough to decide what he is yet, and that he needs to relax and listen to what lots of people tell him, and make up his mind when he’s older.

Let your kids know it’s OK to not know everything, and freely admit that you don’t

I think this is one of the major points of distinction between religious believers and freethinkers: the former think they have “Truth” tied up in a package with a bow, and the latter will usually admit that even with the great discoveries of science, our questions about the universe far outnumber our answers. If you show your kids that you are comfortable with the “great unknowns” in the universe, then they are more likely to grow up comfortable with them as well.

Do you have additional ideas on raising freethinking kids? Leave your comments below!

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Posted October 7th, 2008 by Robert McNally
Categories: Humor
This hits too close to home...

This hits too close to home...

via AtheistCartoons.com

Zada Doak Leon

Posted October 1st, 2008 by Robert McNally
Categories: Personal Story

Philadelphia, PA
zleon@comcast.net

My name when I was in the Church was Zada Doak (now Leon). I grew up in San Diego, California and my mother joined the Worldwide Church of God when I was 5 or 6 years old. She was brought into the Church by my Uncle Jim (James Doak, her younger brother) who became a Preaching Elder in the Church. My mother raised us using her maiden name after her divorce from my father when I was 2 (hence my having the same last name as my Uncle Jim).

Growing up in the Church was miserable for us as young children. Not only because we couldn’t celebrate birthdays (and my mother sent back any gifts we got from family for our birthdays or Christmas until they just stopped sending us anything at all or even talking to us), but because at school my brother and I had to sit in the Principals office whenever our classes were doing things like making Valentine’s decorations, Halloween decorations, etc. We were made fun of and laughed at all the time because of these differences. Whenever we had to take off the 2 weeks for the Feast of Tabernacles, we had to take tons of school books and homework with us to complete during the days of the Feast so we wouldn’t fail in our classes. Christmas was the worst. When other kids came back from Christmas vacation and talked about what they got, we always just hung our heads and said our family didn’t celebrate Christmas. It made us freaks at school. We were not allowed to have any friends that were outside the Church. If we tried, my mother broke the friendships up. The only school dance I ever went to was my Senior Prom, after getting permission from the minister in our Church and after assuring him that the boy was just a friend and I had no romantic interest in him (which was true anyway). I had to be home by midnight, so we left the prom at 11pm in order to be on time. I’m still surprised they allowed me to go. I’m more surprised that the boy I went with put up with it all.

I was accepted to Ambassador College in Bricket Wood in 1974 as my first year of college. I actually knew Ronald Weinland, he was a Sophomore when I was a Freshman there. My mouth feel open earlier this evening when I found a blog about him and his book of predictations. I never saw this in him during that time, he seemed like a nice, normal enough guy. I just now got out my 1974 Envoy to look at his picture. I’m still in shock about what I’ve read about him tonight. Anyway, I transferred to the Pasadena campus for my Sophomore year because my mother had had a small heart attack and I wanted to be closer to home.

I had been baptized in the Church when I was 17. I had asked to be baptized mostly because it would make my Mom and my Uncle Jim proud of me, not because I really felt like I was truly spiritual. My Uncle Jim was a fairly high ranking minister of the Church, so it was important to my Mom that my brother and I were a “real” part of the Church. She couldn’t wait to get to church that first Saturday after I got baptized to brag about it to her friends.

We used to attend Church in Craftman’s Hall in San Diego. I can still see the place in my mind. I grew to hate that place. Just a year or so before I left for Bricket Wood, the Sabbath services were changed to a place that was closer to my home, a meeting room in a hotel or a club (I honestly can’t recall).

I hated how the ministers told us what we could wear, how long our skirts had to be, that we couldn’t wear makeup (HARLOT!) then later changed it to we could, then they changed it again. We were told what soap we could use, what food we could eat, not to see doctors, the control was overwhelming. You cannot believe the extent of control they exerted over the members. In fact, when I had to get a booster shot for smallpox to get my visa to attend Bricket Wood (and I had to or I couldn’t have gone), the minister anointed me with oil and prayed over me, asking that the shot not take affect and for God to cleanse the medicine out of my body. I kid you not.

The Holy Days, especially the Day of Atonement were days I grew to loathe. I couldn’t see the sense in making people light headed and so hungry and miserable that after enduring those long services, all we did was go home and lay like limpets on the couch or on the floor, watching the sky outside the window, hoping the sun would just hurry up and set so we could eat. It really was torture.

During my Sophomore year at Ambassador College, my Uncle Jim left the church, and a lot of the members in his congregation followed him. He later told me that he just couldn’t stomach the things that Garner Ted was doing (sleeping with the other ministers wives and other women in the church) and the other things that were going on that he decided not to tell me about (but we all heard the rumors anyway. And when you’re Uncle is a high ranking minister in the Church, you get to hear it all). To the best of my knowledge, my mother never spoke to him again after he left. After he died, she said she wished she had, but of course it was too late.

I got married on the Ambassador College Pasadena campus to a “non-believer”, and the ministers refused to marry us (I’m now divorced). I’m surprised we were allowed to use one of the musical recital halls to get married in. We just called for a minister out of the yellow pages, who came and conducted the wedding. My cousin Susan Doak (Uncle Jim’s daughter) was still in the Church and was a student at Pasadena…she was one of my bridesmaids (she later left the Church, of course). I was also surprised that I wasn’t tossed out of the church for doing that, but by this stage, I was rarely going to Church anymore, although I hadn’t let my mother know that yet. I think it was another 2 years of pretending I was going before I finally told her I had quit. I was scared to tell her, and with good reason. She talked to the minister in her Church, and to my shock, she was allowed to continue talking to me and seeing me. ; She told me that if the minister had told her to cut me out of her life like she had her brother, she would have. Nothing that the Church had done up to this point hurt me as much as hearing my mother say that to me.

My mother stayed in the Church until she died. It had splintered by then into other churches, and I’m not sure which one she was in. She was in a nursing home by then and didn’t go to Church anymore anyway because of being in the home, but she remained faithful to the day she died. We just agreed to not discuss religion. I was always so angry at the Church because of what it did to my mother. She had been divorced when she joined, and because of that, she was told she could never remarry. She never did. She spent the last 30 years of her life alone once my brother and I left home, when she should have been able to find someone to love her and share her life with.

For that alone, I will never forgive The Worldwide Church of God, Herbert W. Armstrong or any of them that ruined my family. It took me years to realize that the stubbornness and rebellion I feel towards any authority is because of the total control of this Church and its ministers. To this day, I do not handle being told what to do very well. It has caused a lot of damage.

I will admit this: I was happy when I heard that Herbert W. Armstrong had died, and even MORE happy when I heard Garner Ted had died. It’s terrible to say, but that’s how I honestly feel. What’s interesting, is that I have both of their signatures in an old autograph book I used to carry around to get people at church to sign. I’ve kept it because it helps remind me how far I’ve come.

I recently connected with quite a few people I grew up with in the Church. None are in it anymore, but it’s good to be able to talk about all this with people who truly understand what it was like. It’s hard for people who haven’t experienced something like this to understand. If you’ve never endured that brainwashing and control like we did, you can’t possibly “get it”. I’m always asked “why didn’t you or your family just leave”? Because we all felt we couldn’t, it was all we knew. How sad is that, I ask you?

Thank you for allowing me to say all this.

Sincerely,

Zada Doak Leon

Mike

Posted September 14th, 2008 by Robert McNally
Categories: Personal Story

Hello,

My name is Mike. I was born in 1977 in Elizabeth NJ. At less than six weeks old, I was removed from my parents care by the State of New Jersey, Division of Youth and Family Services (DYFS) because I was mysteriously injured and they suspected child abuse. I was severely burned on my right leg and nobody had any logical explanation as to the cause of the injury. My father was at work when this happened, and my mother changed her story numerous times. Upon the conclusion of the State investigation, they found deplorable conditions and placed me in foster care.

I lived with a foster family until the age of 5, and then I was returned to my parents care. I was really too young to understand all of this at the time, but I was a fairly intelligent child, and understood it perhaps better than the average 5 year old, eventually realizing that my foster parents weren’t my parents and I had to return to my real parents.

My parents were members of the WCG. I don’t believe they were members at the time of my injury, but became members after the incident. I remember attending the Union, NJ congregation at first. It was quite a significant change in my life to no longer celebrate my birthday, Christmas and Easter. I was told that my foster parents were worldly and were going to go to hell, and that we were God’s people and this was the proper way to live.

Less than a year later, we moved and started attending a congregation in Bethlehem, PA, closer to our new home. It was here where I had spent most of my time as a WCG child and have my most memories. At first, I recall hating going to church every Saturday at this young age. It seemed like the two hour services lasted forever and they were totally boring. However as time went on, I like everyone else who was brainwashed and manipulated by this corrupted cult, started to buy into the teachings somewhat and believed what I was being told.

My father was extremely physically abusive. His excuses for his excessive beatings were always covered with church related answers. It was well known by the congregation that he was excessively abusive. A lot of the members were actually good people and would sometimes comment to him about it. The minister, however, did nothing about it and even seemed to support it.

My parents eventually separated and divorced. My mother stopped attending immediately upon separating. I lived with my father, and we still attended the WCG. He was abusive the whole time, and continued to claim it was acceptable and righteous to beat your children. I once went to school with my ass so sore that it hurt to even sit down. A teacher reported this to their superiors, who in turn investigated the incident. My father’s reply was, “spare the rod and spoil the child, it says it right in the Bible,” (if that makes any sense), and that it was his religious practice and belief to spank his child. He even asked for and received a letter from the minister of the congregation stating spanking your child is appropriate and godly. This was right around the time HWA was replaced by Tkach.

I eventually went back into foster care because of my father’s excessive abuse, and therefore no longer had to attend the WCG. I was glad I could stop attending and welcomed the change and new found freedom I had. My overall impression of the WCG to this very day is of an organization that my father hid behind to get away with his abuse for as long as he possibly could. He was also quite cheap and thrifty, so not celebrating holidays fit perfectly into his budgeting. I didn’t receive gifts during our Feast of Tabernacles, so I totally dreaded this annual celebration of daily sermons. Once a week was more than enough for me as it was.

I didn’t speak to my father very often after my second and final time being removed from his care, but I recall him once telling me during a mandatory visitation that the Tkach regime had become possessed by the devil, and that God’s real people now attend the PCG. I didn’t understand or care what it was all about, and payed no further mind to it. He eventually stopped attending completely. I later in my life figured out that he gave up on the church during all the post HWA dividing and splintering.

Although my WCG experience wasn’t as long as others, it was still an integral part of my childhood for nearly 5 years. I can only imagine what it must of been like to experience an entire childhood of it, and for others even to carry it into their adult lives. I will say that I found most members to be good people, and upon looking back, it saddens me that so many of them were influenced and controlled by this organization.

Over the years, I never thought about or cared anything for the WCG. I totally distanced it and religion in general from my life. I became and still am to this day an atheist, because of my childhood experience with the WCG and it leaving such a bitter scar on me. If this was how church was, I didn’t want anything to do with it or any other religion at all.

I only recently discovered all the events that happened to the WCG after the Tkach era started implementing changes in the doctrine. As I became increasingly curious, I started to read more about the changes implemented and all the splinter groups and dividing that would occur. I was so shocked to learn of this, considering the WCG I had knew of and what a difference it had become. Wow, I would have never imagined! I’m still totally dumbfounded by it all weeks later. Looking at the situation from the perspective or a former insider turned outsider, it is blatantly obvious that Tkach is a corrupt thief who imposed whatever he deemed profitable. It also became obvious that the whole church in general was comprised of evil, money hungry crooks making a lavish living in the name of God.

I also learned that a larger spin off named UCG eventually formed after the Tkach administration deemed it acceptable to observe the Sabbath on Sunday (the sabbath on Sunday…what?!…how could this be? This wasn’t the WCG I knew.) This group comprised of a board of elders, one of whom would eventually be in charge of the whole operation (Pastor General or something like that.) He was the minister of the Bethlehem, PA congregation that I attended as a child. This was also the man who approved of my fathers abuse, and wrote letters defending it. Upon reading this, it burned me up to think that this same man eventually was the leader of a global organization claiming to be God’s true people. What a shame.

I am now 31 years old. I lead a happy life for myself despite the odds against me from my non-traditional upbringing. I became a successful person without any form of god in my life. I am gainfully employed and happy. I am still single and would like to meet a nice woman soon and start a family.

In closing, it was great for me to see stories of others who endured WCG childhood experiences and emotionally healthy for me to share mine. I also wanted to express the shock I strangely felt upon recently learning of all the post HWA changes that occurred to the WCG. Thank you all for listening and I wish all of you the best.

Mike, Linden NJ

Melissa

Posted September 14th, 2008 by Robert McNally
Categories: Personal Story

Today I found your blog. I grew up in Atlanta, GA and in the “Church” from birth–1969 and rebelled at around 16 years of age and refused to attend and later left home at age 17yrs. I do remember “fun” times in the church with the YOU youth group between the ages of 11–15 yrs, but also remember the fear of stepping out of line (father) and how you were taught you were inherently “evil,” essentially born “bad.” After spending a good portion of my life searching for some kind “truth” to life (”why are we here” question) I finally came to the “realization” there was no such thing as God— and it was all made up; in fact all religions are made up in order to control people and societies. I recently came across the new world order/secret government/white supremacist/fear tactics agenda (David Icke) and something clicked inside of me: “Oh my god, this sounds eerily familiar to the ‘doctrine’ I grew up in…” and it works out about the right time-wise 1930’s with HWA. And I wondered if he (HWA) got his “separatist/control” agenda from the same people. Anyway, I went searching to try and connect the dots and I found your website. I remember as a child/teen listening to countless sermons about “nimrod” and the pagan Babylonians, the worldly pagan holidays, the tribulation, and how one world government would be created and and Jesus would come back and the world would fight against him…

Anyway, I am still searching for answers. But after joining the military, a college education in behavioral science, researching every religion/philosphy/political science under the sun, a career in DoD, and most recently coming back from the middle east (Kuwait); today I’m only confident of 2 things: there is no God, or at least not the God I was taught as a child; and purposeful tactics of controlling the global “masses” is still alive and well today.

I would love to hear from anyone who can relate to what I’m saying, or just wants to comment.

Thank you… :) Melissa –Denver, CO